My Secret to a Healthy Marriage
Food for Thought, Lifestyles, Personal — By trench on January 28, 2008 at 4:33 am | 954 Visitors
I recently read a post on The Secret to a Good Marriage on Saphrym’s site and just had to add my 0.02.
Although I’ve been married for just a little over two years now (since ’05), my wife and I had actually dated and lived together for a total of eight years before we took our formal vows. During that period of time we went through all the typical trials of a growing relationship, but we managed to get through them by learning the art of picking and choosing our arguments. In the beginning we fought about everything, and it soon became physically and mentally draining for the both of us. Our relationship took some bad turns, but I think that we both realized at some point that some things were just not worth arguing about and changes had to be made if we ever had plans of actually spending our lives together. For the past few years now, our fights have been few and far in between, and I credit that to the fact that we both have learned to accept some of our differences and work beyond them.
The second secret to a healthy marriage is setting a regular schedule for quality time. Not very long after my marriage, I got caught up in bodybuilding, my regular job, web design, and several other extra-curricular activities, that kept me away from my wife for extended periods of time. Although we sat in the same room, the fact that my attention was not on her made her feel quite neglected.
Recently, I’ve made it a point to spend Sunday’s with my wife watching a film, going to lunch, or taking her out for dinner. Simple things such as these really save a marriage, and I’ve noticed that she much happier since I’ve made it a point to take some time out for her. No matter what goes on in your life, quality alone time with your other half is a incredibly important aspect to keeping a healthy relationship.
My last secret to a healthy marriage may seem very trivial, but is perhaps the most important ingredient. Saying the simple words “I love you” sincerely can save a relationship from its demise. I know it has made a huge impact on my relationship and has kept me on solid footing when times have been rough. My wife reminds me every single day, and it always puts a secret smile on my face. No matter what the circumstances are, just knowing she is by my side and is willing to do anything for me is enough to conquer the world and all its problems. Those three little words are very powerful if used properly, and it serves as a reminder, to why you fell in love in the first place.
Do you know whats funny? This post was actually written as a simple to entry for a contest. It became much more than that in the end! Hopefully this helps some of our lost couples out there! Best of luck!
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I have mixed heritage of Chamorro, Filipino, and Japanese and I currently reside on the beautiful island of Guam. My interests include critiquing films, eating out, import cars, gaming, web design, MMA, and bodybuilding. I'm also a die-hard fan of both the Los Angeles Lakers and San Francisco 49ers. I hate bandwagon fans!
12 Comments
LOL Call me the eternal hopeless romantic but if I were your wife I’d be very upset that this is the topic you chose to try and win a contest. Of course I mean that in the lightest way possible!! I’m not judging… I’m just saying. Hope you win the contest! And wouldn’t you know it, there’s one answer to the question I left for you in reply to your last comment on my site! hahaha giving away money in a contest isn’t something I can do anytime soon though – at least not until I get a job!!
fragileheart’s last blog post..Anyone feeling generous?
No offense man, but I don’t think you have nearly enough experience to be dishing out martial advice. Maybe in 10 or 20 years.
Leon’s last blog post..My thoughts on…Heath Ledger’s death
@Reggie- haha. nah, she won’t be upset. As long as I can buy her something with it. I’m not sharing any intimate secrets. Just what worked for me.
@-Leon. No offense taken ever. This is a public website! lol. Its funny how people take things so seriously on the web these. I’m not dishing out martial advice. The title says My secrets to a healthy marriage, and I’m just stating what worked for me! It might work for you too! I’ve been in a healthy relationship for over 10 years now, so I’m just sharing what worked for me. Besides, I know some people in terrible marriages lasting over 30 years! Does that make them still more experienced than I? Think about it! My wife and I have seen a ton of couples come and go and we are still going strong! We must be doing something right! RIGHT? haha
why sex is not on the list?? haha just kidding
me and hubby are opposite. hes so quiet and you never hear him joke around :P but im loud and *funny :P
we have a lot of differences, he hates egg, i love egg, he hate this and that but what fuuny is, the one he hates is the one i actually love, the one he doenst like is the one i like. but somehow the relationship is getting stronger everyday..i guess were the living proof that “opposites attract” :P hehe
yeah..keep the fire burning. as the title of the song goes “eternal flame” (hihi.. me so cheezy :P)
rose’s last blog post..etc.. etc
Nice post.
You’re right about quality time. Seems to be the number one thing about relationships that would make it stronger everyday. I’m not married yet but I am practicing myself to be responsible as “the man” in a relationship :)
Wish you guys more happiness and blessings! :)
LivingSouL’s last blog post..The Five Languages of Love
Nice photos buddy!
Hmmm. You might want to give me some relationship advice. Just yesterday I had another big fallout with my girlfriend.
We seem to argue a lot, and unfortunately I’m not quite sure if it will pass like it did for you.
:(
Mike’s last blog post..Free Xbox Live Gold Membership
Butt butt head. Haha. You guys put “MARTIAL” advice instead of “MARITAL” advice you fart fart face. You sound like a Haole in your reviews, but they’re damn good; if I do say so myself! English boy. Math geek.
it’s a damn good thing you figured this out early on in your marriage! lots of people give up, get divorced, talk smack about “the ex,” and wonder what went wrong.
Thanks for this good relationship advice. It will just help mine out. Thanks again!